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I just realized that it's been quite a while since I posted last. I apologize for my lack of regularity, it happens sometimes. And in fact it kind of ties in with what I was thinking about today. I know this is a topic I've brought up before, but then it seems to be a rather central theme to my life, so deal with the repetition.

I've been reading this book, Truck: On Rebuilding a Worn-Out Pickup and Other Post-Technological Adventures, and it's actually pretty good. If you're wondering why I read such a book, well it's because I have a plan of buying an old truck from the 40's or 50's and fixing it up as my work truck. Any, back on topic. The interesting thing about this book, other then random anecdotes and lots of talk about the frustration of rebuilding anything, was the parallels with life in general. In fact it invokes Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance (which if you haven't read, you should, even though it can drag).

There are primarily two central ideas in Zen. First that there is an idea of quality, and this idea is what should be the driving force in everything we do and make. And second, the idea of gumption. Gumption is the driving force that brings us to do anything. It is only with full gumption that we are ever able to achieve quality.

Now take a look at truck. It mirrors Zen in many ways, from the obvious that one is about repairing a motorcycle and the other is about rebuilding a truck. But more deeply they both explore the concepts of not only what is worth doing, but how one must work to accomplish it. In truth I feel that Robert Pirsig (author of Zen) does a more thorough job of elucidating the more intellectual concepts then does John Jerome (author of Truck). But then, I think that was also his goal. Anyway, I'm not interested in writing a book report, if your curious, by all means read the books and I'll discuss them.

The thing that strikes me in both it the idea of keeping up motivation. I'll use Pirsig's term, because I like it. Gumption. Here's the way he sees it, and I feel he is quite right about it. Gumption is like a reservoir of motivation. Before beginning a project this reservoir fills and initiates your action. Then as you work the reservoir drains away to feed your efforts, much like water in a hydroelectric dam. The problem comes when you push too hard, or go too long. You tend to run your gumption dry and then you stuck.

A good personal example of this is my most recent kitchen remodel in what is now our old house. I wanted to add a dishwasher to make life easier (doesn't always seem that you have to make your life more difficult to in turn make it easier?). To do this there were a couple of obstacles to overcome. The existing counter had to be ripped out and a new one built to accommodate the dishwasher (in addition to plumbing and running electrical for the dishwasher). Then the kitchen also was not completed from the last remodel, so I also had to agree to complete all the work previously left undone. To top it off I wanted to pull out the tile counter tops that were falling apart and put in some new wooden one I would make. All in all a fair amount of work, but by no means un-doable. I took a week off work thinking that I could finish it all in one week (my first mistake). There was no way I could complete the work in that time frame, but I tried any way. I pushed myself as hard as I could, and by the end of the week I had burnt through my gumption so severely that I'm not sure it will ever come back for that project. Now I see the things I've not finished and I'm not sure what it would take to get me to work on them again.

Here I am faced with the lessons from both books. Never force yourself to continue when all gumption is gone. In fact, never let your gumption sink too low. The idea is to lead yourself along. Instead of working until you can't stand to work anymore, stop a little early. If something starts going wrong, rest, let your gumption build back up before tackling it again. Make sure you never wear yourself out. If you stop early, when you just begin to feel tired of the project, and maybe even a little hungry to keep working, and take a good rest your gumption will build back up and next time you under take the project you'll enjoy it more and things will go more smoothly and more successfully.

Properly managed, your tasks shouldn't wear you down and the dread won't build up. Part of the problem I think is that in general people underestimate the amount of time a given project will take. In the example I gave of the kitchen remodel, if I had been realistic and said that instead of one week of work that there were two or even three weeks of work I would have not pushed myself too hard. I would not have tried to get too much done, and I wouldn't have grown to hate the project. I know this is true. I don't mind remodeling, in fact I generally enjoy it. But then there are those projects I push too hard on, and can never get myself to finish them.

In Truck John Jerome faces the same problem with the truck he is working on. He tries to finish it too quickly, and burns himself out. It takes a six month break before he is ready to get back to it and actually finish the truck. I think anyone who has taken on a long and involved project knows that feeling.

All right, so now I have a basic idea of how I work. Does it help? Not really... Yet I think. It's one thing knowing how you should operate, and another thing entirely actually doing so.

And so this has become a sort of mantra for me. Especially now that I'm getting ready to undertake my own truck rebuild, a project that could well take a year or two to complete. Forcing yourself to burn intensely for a short period and tearing through the work is easy. Turning it down and sustaining it at a level that not only keeps you going, but keeps you enjoying and doing quality work, now that's a horse of a different color.

This is why I think most people stop enjoying their hobbies when they turn them into their livelihoods. It easier to maintain a lower level when you have to make time to do something then it is to do the same when all you have is time.

That ends our lesson for today. So remember class, slow and steady wins the race.